Sunday, March 21, 2004

time saving practices that you may incorporate into your own life *To save time, I flush the toilet while still pissing. *I throw all my whites and darks and color laundry into the same machine and wash it on warm. *I avoid slowing down when turning by sweeping way out into the opposite lane. *If the guy or gal in front of me in line at the check out counter starts making non-business related chit-chat with the chashier that wastes my time, I focus my eyes into laser beams and stare at them so hard they feel an uncomfortable burning in their skull. *I don't belong to any clubs or volunteer groups or anything that involves meeting with other people on a regular basis.  (This especially includes church and softball teams.) *I don't send cards or gifts for birthdays, anniversaries, or other holidays.  (I do bring cards to the birthdays of family members who are here in town, but I have to scan the card aisle for the one card that isn't gooshing with touchy-feelie crap: "Sister, You have meant so many special things to me...") *I instantly say "no" to all phone solicitors, panhandlers, and friends that want me to help them move. *I don't want to meet anyone's family, or go on a picnic where there's going to be an uncle Dave, or nanna Thompson. *I have never once had a desire to go back and look at photographs of things I have done or places I have been.  In fact, last night I threw out all my photographs to make room in my desk. *I don't read introductions, forwards, or prefaces, and lately, I don't read books.  I do scan the newspaper everyday for really horrible or weird things and then toss it aside. *I don't cook at all (unless you count making coffee).  I get my meals to go from restaurants up and down fourth street.  If I get fries, then my fries are gone by the time I'm back to my house.  Whatever's left I eat in front of my tv.  If my daughter is staying with me I throw her her sandwich in her room and say, "here's your sandwich."  (When I first moved into this house, I was dismayed to to find that the gas stove didn't work.  I called the landlord and told them about the situation.  A couple days later a repairman came out and fixed the stove.  I checked it myself to see if it was working.  That was the last time I used my stove).   8:59:22 PM    comment []

return of the gesber   (the following is an e-mail sent to me outside of the radioland comments forum)   I envy the hardships you've had to endure.  "Psycho" girlfriends, menial jobs, and a brief stint in the Army before you were sadly discharged.  This is as bad as it gets in the world of white privilege.     You've never gone hungry, never slept without a bed, never had to share a room, never had to share bath water, never had to shower without hot water, never been shot at, never been harassed by drug peddlers, never been randomly pulled over by police officers because of your skin color, never been denied a job because of your race, never needed a job in order to provide for your family, etc etc.   Life is just a fun, frolicome series of juvenile mishaps for Mark Michaels.    Phillip Gesber 11:19:52 AM    comment []

(my response to Mr. Gesber) Are you looking for some sort of pity party?  Why don't you write your own blog about how you had to share dirty bathwater with people and eat cockroaches for breakfast or whatever?  If you've had it harder than me, then tell the world.  I don't give a fuck. But keep this in mind Gesber.  A certain amount of "hard luck" is comical.  And a certain amount of misfortune can happen to good intelligent, hardworking people.  But if your life and your childhood has sucked to the extent that you're implying, then it sounds like you we're just raised by idiots or drug addicts or whatever.  That's not exactly something to go around bragging about.  You can blame "whitey" the rest of your life if you want, and I'm sure you will.  As long as you do,you will be a bitter, backwards looking person that achieves nothing close to his potential.  Meanwhile, there are millions of people of color who take responsibility for their lives and are reaching incredible heights of success.  With your attitude don't ever expect to become one of them.  (And I saw a couple of your crackpot "academic journals."  They all just say "poor me, I blame whitey.")  ((ps I told you, you  couldn't stop reading.)) Mark Michaels 10:52:41 AM    comment []

the truth comes out (part of a series on e-mails from Whitney, my most recently snuffed flame) Mar 20, 2004 06:56 PM Yeah, I felt bad after I wrote that to you. I should have said something. Best of luck to you in the future... the only real reason I broke up with you is because I knew you wouldn't take me back after I told you I cheated on you. I was kind of thinking about ending it in NY (before I ever cheated) but figured we could work through my insecurities. But then I cheated, and I decided that there was no point in actually trying to work it out because if I did something like that 2 1/2 months into the relationship, what were the implications for the future? Plus, if we had worked through it, I would have gone through my days wondering if you were going to cheat on me just to get me back. I didn't tell you sooner because you once told me something like "it's better not to tell." My final verdict is that I'm too immature to be in a serious relationship. I had to end it. But I still care, you know that. The guy, by the way, meant nothing to me. I was not justified in ragging on you because you were hitting on another girl, but it seemed like you were rubbing it in my face. You knew I'd be reading, didn't you? My psych said the best way to get over someone is to end it cold turkey. Unfortunately, I have your things and you have mine, so it won't be as easy as that. I'll be in touch with you, and I don't blame you if you want to burn my coat or something because I'd go crazy if I found out a guy cheated on me. I probably won't be looking at your blog anymore as I am well aware that you are going to trash me in it. Once again, I can't blame you. You obviously weren't heartbroken about the breakup anyway, so I won't concern myself with it either. I wish you the best of luck with everything. 10:24:16 AM    comment []

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