Friday, February 11, 2005

bob bandit moment of the day Bob Bandit tried to sell a job  today to this one guy in Ellenton with a sprawling property and dozens of oaks.  (It was one of Joe Venuti's leads, and the homeowner probably agreed to get the estimate just to be polite.) (The homeowner guy kind of looked how Gary Larson draws deer hunters: wearing a flannel shirt, but still very dorky with glasses, a big nose and push-broom mustache). Nevertheless, Bob proposed trimmng all of the trees and removing certain limbs for about $3,000 bucks.  The homeowner listened very politely, and said that it was a good price for a lot of work, but he just couldn't afford it. So then Bob came down to $2,500, but the guy said he still couldn't swing it. Later in the morning, Bob called the guy back, and suggested just doing the most important parts of the job for $1,000. "I still can't spend that today," the guy said. "Well how much can you spend today?" Bob said, sounding very stern and annoyed. "I really can't spend anything today," the guy said. "Well don't ever call me again for a price if you don't have any money to spend," Bob said, pretty much just yelling at the guy.  "I'm not out here just for shits and giggles." 10:41:31 PM    comment [] another beth that I had the hots for, but who hated me Seeing Beth's comment (below the "monsters" post) reminds me of Beth I knew about 10 years ago.  She was actually really hot, and it was kind of weird because I was dating her best friend Kerri, who was fairly hot, but not as hot as Beth.  I often fantasized about having sex with Beth, but it seemed unlikely to happen, not just because the best friend thing, but also because Beth really seemed to hate me.  I'm not sure what I did to make Beth dislike me so much, since I always thought of myself a really nice guy, who just happened to be devastatingly handsome.  But regardless, we just kept having these little flare-ups and run-ins, which stoked her dislike of me, and further undermined my chances of having sex with her. For instance, one time, me and Kerri and Beth and her boyfriend (and others possibly) were going on this camping trip.  We made this plan to hit the road by a certain hour,  and I was packed and eager to go.  Beth wasn't done packing however, she was waiting for some underwear to dry or some such thing. When I heard we were all being held up by Beths underwear, I kind of rolled my eyes with exasperation.  Beth saw me roll my eyes, and she got upset and called me a jerk. Then there was this other time that I came home from a hard day of work and looked in my refrigerator for something to eat.  To my delight there was a delicious looking bag of grapes.  I took the grapes and proceeded to eat all of them over the next hour or so. The next day, Beth was over at my place with my girlfriend, Kerri (who lived with me).  Suddenly, Beth wanted to know what the hell happened to her grapes. "Your grapes?" I said.  "I ate the grapes that were in my refrigerator.  I figured Kerri got them for us." Then Beth got very angry and told me that those grapes were for her pet snake. ( Apparently, they were being kept in our refrigerator because hers was broken. )  She kept verbally assailing me again and again about eating her snakes grapes which didn't belong to me.  I kept asserting my defense that I should be able to assume that anything that I find in my refrigerator is mine. This went on and on for a while, and we never really resolved it. The last thing I remember about Beth is that she was staying at her grandma's condo near the bay.  I remember trapsing around the place with Kerri and some people drinking beer.  I still thought she was hot, but I never did get to hook up with her. The last time I talked to my ex-girfriend Keri, she was living in North Carolina and having an affair with a veteranarian who also happened to be her boss.  She invited me to check out her web came sex-site but I never did.  7:21:12 PM    comment []

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