To the many fans of the great Mexican painter Diego Rivera:
My apologies. It is with great sadness that I must inform you that the well-publicized exhibition of my personal Diego Rivera collection, intended to compliment the current National Gallery of Art show, has been cancelled. My show, which was to be held at my house, at my expense (no entrance fee!), on Saturdays and Sundays and every Thursday evening in June, was intended to fill in the gaps of the National Gallery show by focusing on several of the artist’s lesser known works, a grouping that I call: “Paintings my father won from Diego Rivera in a poker game, Mexico City, 1946.”
The show must be cancelled not for lack of interest – I have received more than a hundred phone calls from laymen and art scholars alike. No, the show must be called off because – and it pains me to have to say this – I made the whole thing up. I do not in fact own a single Diego Rivera painting. I’m just a lonely man who thought this might be a good way to meet people.
I do actually own a book about Diego Rivera, with lots of beautiful color reproductions of the artist’s work and a detailed history of his life. It sits on a coffee table in my living room. I dust it regularly.
Indeed, the Rivera book was quite a popular book at my last home gallery showing: “Little known Renoirs I picked up at a garage sale in East Germany.” Another ruse to meet people. Alas, people don’t stay long when you can’t produce the goods.
I sure hope this note reaches everyone who was planning to attend my Rivera show. Hey, if you’re in Washington for the National Gallery of Art show and you still want come by for a visit or to demand some compensation for your travel expenses, I would be glad to host you. We can have some coffee and a crumb cake. And if you happen to like Van Gogh, well, then I think you’ll be in for a special surprise.
8:58:33 AM  Stories
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