I am to blame
I had to let myself go today.
I should have seen the warnings signs.
I haven’t been taking things seriously.
I haven’t been working hard enough.
I haven’t been meeting expectations.
I called myself in on the carpet.
I asked for an explanation.
I didn’t answer: I was daydreaming, looking out the window.
I said that this was exactly the problem.
I asked for another chance.
I declared that it was too late.
I argued that I had a short attention span, blurred vision, ennui.
I pointed the finger at myself for always falling back on excuses.
I threatened to sue for discrimination.
I scoffed that I didn’t stand a chance of winning a law suit.
I pointed out that I had some rather compromising photographs.
I was incredulous – why, that’s impossible!
I mimicked in a baby voice, why, that’s impossible.
I warned that this was a serious accusation.
I smiled coyly and said, yes, I know.
I started piecing it together: if I had photographs that means I was there.
I said, of course I was there; where else would I be?
I tried to stay calm: what is it that I want?
I said, I just want things to go back to the way they were before.
I sneered at the prospect, calling it impossible.
I got up to leave.
I pleaded: wait, just a second.
I said, I’m listening.
I mumbled, I might be willing to reconsider.
I said, I’m sorry, I didn’t hear that.
I cleared my voice and spoke again – I, I changed my mind.
I thought so.
I swear, this is the last chance.
I doubt it.
I expect more effort this time.
I can’t promise a thing.
I want the photographs.
I said, what photographs?
I cried out: bastard!
I joked, it takes one to know one.
I pounded a fist on the desk.
I walked out and took the rest of the day off.
1:06:42 AM  Random Nonsense
|
