Extravagantly rich circumlocution
This is the blurb from Starbucks on their new Special Reserve Blend 2004:
"An exquisitely balanced blend of the world's finest coffees, offering unmistakable citrus notes, a luxurious mouthfeel and a distinctively alluring finish."
Or was it...
"A distinctively alluring blend of the world's finest coffees, offering luxurious citrus notes, an exquisite mouthfeel and an unmistakably balanced finish."
Or...
"A citrusy blend of the world's finest mouthfeels, offering balanced luxury notes, an alluring distinctiveness and an unmistakable coffee finish."
Or maybe what they really mean to say is...
"Great sex through the night with a beautiful, fresh-smelling movie star on fine Egyptian cotton sheets – this coffee is like that!"
9:32:42 PM
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