Where have all the ugly couches gone?
I haven't seen any truly awful couches discarded along the side of the road in several months now. It seems I'm in a bit of a rut. So, today, I took matters into my own hands.
I went out after rush hour was finished this evening and left one of these leather moose throw pillows on the median strip of a divided highway near my house as an offering to the great God of Roadside Furniture, hoping that he will have mercy on me (and you know he’s a he because only men would buy the kind of couches I seem to find on the side of the road). I turned the pillow to face Branson, Missouri, which is, of course, the Mecca of tastelessness in America. Then I doused the pillow in gasoline, set it ablaze and danced around it, chanting, "Oh shit, I hope this works" over and over again. Who knows? Maybe it will work. We'll see. I really have no idea what I am doing.
9:56:45 PM  Random Nonsense
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