The humor that stuck

Leave it to Beaver


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  Tuesday, June 20, 2006


One

 

Welcome to the Mid-Continent Airport Bar. How ya doin’ tonight?

 

One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do

 

Ahh, I see you’ve been to Wichita before.


Two can be as bad as one


You lost me there, fella.

 

It's the loneliest number since the number one

I see. Well, how about a drink then?


No is the saddest experience you'll ever know

 

No doesn’t have to be sad. Not really.


Yes, it's the saddest experience you'll ever know

 

Hey, I’m just a bartender. What do I know?


`Cause one is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
One is the loneliest number, worse than two

 

Wait a second. You’re from that band Three Dog Night!


It's just no good anymore since she went away

 

I saw you guys back in ’73.


Now I spend my time just making rhymes of yesterday

Those were the days, dude. Rock and Roll ruled.


One is the loneliest, number one is the loneliest
Number one is the loneliest number that you'll ever do

 

Okay. Okay. Just keep it down, my friend.


One is the loneliest, one is the loneliest

 

Jeeze, you really need to talk to someone about this – a professional.


One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do

 

Are you crying? Come on now.


It's just no good anymore since she went away

 

Look, man, it’s been like 35 years. You really need to get over her. Move on, you know?

 

(Number) One is the loneliest
(Number) One is the loneliest
(Number) One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
(Number) One is the loneliest
(Number) One is the loneliest
(Number) One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do

 

Okay, you know what? No chorus. No chorus! You’re starting to unnerve the other customers.

 

One…

 

Two. Three. Time for you to go.


10:09:24 PM    Stories  comments []  


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Last update: 7/6/2006; 12:39:47 AM.




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