Regarding an encounter with a discarded old couch in my neighborhood
Well, it’s about time. How many laps around the block did it take for you to decide if I was worth a photograph? Three? Four? Am I so plain? So ordinary? Or is it that I am just not interesting enough to be included in your pantheon of discarded furniture? Maybe you think there is no story here worthy of your blog. Oh, yes, I know about the others. The deer couch. The sunset couch. Even your own couch and love seat, carried out to the curb for you and your friends to sit on and take a few snapshots – everyone had a good laugh as I recall – before the trash man came and crushed them up in the mechanical jaws of the refuse truck. Don’t bother trying to understand the metaphysics at work here my friend. It is beyond even your comprehension. I am speaking to you only because you seem to appreciate the other worldliness of a discarded piece of furniture on the side of the road. You seem to know that there is something going on there. A story that should be told before it is forever lost. Did you know that there is an afterlife for discarded furniture? Of course there is. Think about it. In the afterlife there is nowhere for people to sit down. When a new couch or chair shows up it is welcomed, revered even. We don’t have to wait in any lines or go through any gates, we just float right in and are quickly set down alongside a coffee table or a bookshelf. It doesn’t matter if we match the existing furniture. There is no preconceived décor in the afterlife. Basically, there’s a little feng shui going on, but that’s pretty much it. In the afterlife, even a simple blue three cushion overstuffed microfiber couch like me can end up supporting and comforting the haunches of a king for all eternity. So, don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. I’m going on to a better place than this curb. Ahh, I think I hear the squealing brakes of the trash truck now. Thanks for coming by and seeing me off. Oh, and by the way, that jump drive you’ve been looking for is under the cushion of the leather chair in your living room. It fell out of your pocket along with sixty-seven cents in change.
10:57:44 AM  Random Nonsense
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