TRAIN UP A CHILD

The Columbine incident and similar incidents in Arkansas, Kentucky and elsewhere have all of us asking, "What is with our children? Where are we going wrong? What can we do to keep this from happening again?"

As long as violence, carried out by children and adolescents, was confined to our inner cities, most of us were not overly distressed. I am sure we were thinking something like, "What else do you expect. Bring up a child in a crime, drug, violence infested environment and you will reap a violent, drug-using, underage criminal. You get what you sow. It is as simple as that."

What we have experienced in recent months is senseless violence coming out of our rural areas - areas previously thought to be safe from the war zones of our inner cities. May I suggest that the problems are complex sociologically and psychologically. Simple answers and blaming are not likely to be found helpful.

The Bible speaks of "training a child in the way he should go and even when he is old he will not depart from it" (Proverbs 22:6). Traditionally we have understood this PRESCRIPTIVELY. We have perceived this verse as a promise, i.e., if you do "X" then "Y" will happen. I think we should understand this verse DESCRIPTIVELY. Descriptively, this verse speaks of the powerful influence of parental training. "Train a child and he/she will never be able to get away from that training."

Children may and often do choose a different "way" from that to which they were directed by their parents. We are all free moral agents and responsible for the choices we make. But parental training is so powerful that in order to choose a different way, the child has to go against everything their instincts tell them is the right way - the correct way.

The fact is, "train a child in the way he should not go and when he is old he will still be effected by that training." Adult children of alcoholic parents and dysfunctional homes can testify to this truth. Children never get a way from their training. Sometimes they overcome a terrible "bringing up," but they never completely "depart from it." A child brought up in the way he should go may reject that way, but they will never completely get away from it.

Early childhood training is powerful. Parents have an awesome power and a terrible responsibility. No one needs to tackle the job of parenting without help from God. One of the tasks God has assigned to his church is to help parents "train their children." Albert Schweitzer, on his last trip to the United States, said: "The most important thing for your children to do as they are growing up is to see you worship." You say, "Well, my children do not understand the sermon and other aspects of the liturgy. " They do not have to understand. They don't need to comprehend all that the preacher is saying or all that is happening. What the old missionary/theologian was saying was, "Children need to see their parents look to Someone beyond themselves for direction and guidance. They need to see their parents worship." "Train up" means setting the example---worshiping with your child and saying by your example that seeking direction from God is important.

Next Sunday would a good time for families who are not accustomed to worshiping regularly to start a new habit. Remember, "training up a child" involves more than telling - more than disciplining - it involves showing. "Show a child the way he should go, and that truth will be with him all of his life." Proverbs 22:6 TAV (The Atkinson Version).