FAT

When I announce that I feel fat most people just laugh thinking that I was making some joke.  While I would not It isn’t true.  For the last month and a half I have done very little exercise due to the humid weather and my own general laziness.  While the scale reads about the same number I feel much heavier.  I need some sort of motivation to drive me back to the gym but finding that motivation has been a bit difficult. 

Some things that give me motivation:

* Going to the beach and seeing bodies that are far better than my own.

* Taking off all my clothes and looking in a mirror

* Purchasing a fitness magazine with cute boys on the cover.

I attempted all three recently without my desired results.  I ended up reading the fitness magazine and being a bit cynical about the whole fitness magazine genre and decided to “fix” the cover.  Here is a poem, of sorts, based on the Fitness for Men  cover.

THE PERFECT BODY: AN ULTIMATE PRESCRIPTION

Ripped abs

By July fourth!                                    

Buy July fourth abs ripped.

100 ways to lose 10 pounds. 

10 pounds to lose 100 ways

50 PROVEN

ways to burn more fat

fat more to burn. Ways?  proven 50.

MORE SEX

HEALTHIER PROSTATE

healthy + prostate = sex more

bigger arms

IN JUST FOUR WEEKS!

weak arms in for bigger

just four !

What does the above poem mean?  What is it trying to do?  Don’t ask me.  I am just finding ways to make my purchase worthwhile.  I just hope that this fatty trend of zero exercise does not continue once I move to a less humid environment.

1:00:06 AM