Too much of a good thing
My boxes arrived on schedule and I've been bagging product and writing invoices and stuffing new brochures into crisp white bags. But something about this process has turned my brain into moldy melted cheese.
I rubbed the new Avon Smile fragrance lotion into my arms. It comes in a sleek neon orange tube imprinted with cheery retro light citrus circles. I loved the fruity clean scent, and squeezed out a generous dollop and went to town, upper arms, lower arms, under arm fat, wrists and fingers. Mmmmmmmmm! The lotion feels soft and buttery, and it left my arms looking plump and dewey like a 50's virgin.
But holey moley. The smell grew as I put bottles and lipsticks into bags and now my head is spinning and I want to vomit. I tried taking a shower and using the Planet Spa Dead Sea Minerals Pedicure Salt Scrub on my arms, hoping to sand blast the Smile off my skin, but it only made the smelly problem worse. Even the dog is avoiding me now. I tried to cover up my arms with a long sleeved sweatshirt, but I started to sweat, intensifying the odor once again.
Those weapons of mass destruction aren't in Iraq. They're here, in orange bottles on my bedroom floor.
Please, call a medic!
8:58:42 PM 
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