The Great Disneyland EU Debate - Part Five
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
I watched Karli pass out the paper. Her dark hair hung in ringlets half-way down her back and it swished back and forth in a gentle lullaby rhythm. She spent time at each table, kissing cheek after cheek, conversing with men and women, laughing, bending down to touch each guest's shoulder with a simple pat. The Disney workers moved from table to table, too, a dance troop of service - dipping and bowing, glass, plate, carafe. Ulak leaned toward me and whispered he needed to visit the Men's Room, and as he strode through the hall I had a brilliant idea.
I rose, too, waved at Cocktail Dress Blondie, and grabbed my purse. I reached inside and grabbed a few Avon samples, eyed Table Number One and made my move.
"Pardon me! Merhaba!" I gave the Turkish hello and tipped forward, dropping the samples across the fig and pomegranate centerpiece in one elegant swoop. "I'm the Party Favor Hostess! We have Avon Line and Wrinkle Corrector samples this evening!"
The woman smiled and reached for the samples. The men looked mesmerized by my optical illusion rotating bosom. All right! I curtsied, walked to Table Two, and repeated the process. I continued through the room, avoiding Ana's table and my own, finishing just as Karli completed her paper and pen run.
"Ladies and Gents! Let's get Turk Trivia started! We'll have twenty questions, winning table takes all!" The DJ spoke into the microphone with a low sexy voice. His eyes closed as the words cascaded out of his mouth, as if he were in religious ecstasy. "First question! Heh heh heh! What is the Turkish word for "coffee?"
A murmur buzz filled the hall, and two hundred Turkish Coffee specialists chuckled and grinned. I handed our table's paper to Ulak and he wrote the word "Kahve" in clean block letters. A woman at the table to our right squeezed open an Avon sample and began applying it, peering in a compact mirror.
"Next question! Fill in the blank: Turkish bridegrooms were once required to make a promise during their wedding ceremonies to always provide their new wives with..." Laughter filled the room once again and Blondie and I looked at each other with a confused expression.
"Coffee, Birdie. Coffee." Ulak sipped his Raki and glanced at the table to our right. "Look Birdie! Someone at that table has brought those little Avon squares you give out to your neighbors!"
"Oh, wow, interesting." I tried to distract Ulak. "Now, you say the answer is coffee? How fascinating! Tell us more about it, Ulak."
"Next question! Name all the countries bordering Turkey!" Ulak bent down to scribble a list of countries and I breathed with relief. The DJ continued asking Turkish questions, Ulak kept answering them, and Blondie and I rolled our eyes more times than I could count. Blondie's husband wandered away and the rest of our table seemed engrossed in conversation about the intricacies of coffee investment. Ulak's gonna win it all, I thought. Damn, that man is smart.
"Last question! I will ask you to send one representative from your table up with your answers once you complete this last question! What country is anxious to join the European Union?"
"Oh hey! I know that one!" I swiped the paper from Ulak and wrote Turkey with a grand flourish. "Ta Da!!!" Ulak nodded his head toward the front of the room.
"Go ahead. Be our representative. I think you have already been a representative this evening. I will drink more Raki." He raised his glass in salute and I slunk off to pass our paper in for grading, my face burning at being caught.
Ten minutes later the DJ played a clip of trumpets tooting a great fanfare. "Ladies and Gents! We have two winning tables! With 19 questions each correct, our amazing Turk Trivia experts are the well-known and impressive business men and women of Table Three and the crazy Americans of Table Fifteen!" The room errupted in catcalls and applause. Blondie and I jumped up and down, high-fiving each other in the process. I did my infamous butt dance. Ulak continued to sit and sip, sit and sip.
The DJ continued. "Table Three only missed the last question! The correct answer for question twenty is "Turkey is the country anxious to join the EU!" And kudos to Table Fifteen for getting that one correct! The one they missed was question eleven: In what year did Turkey become a member of NATO? Of course, Table Three got that one right - 1952!"
At that moment, the eight members of Table Three rose in unison and a familiar elderly woman's voice cut through the clapping and chatter.
"We are NOT anxious to become a member of the EU!"
To be continued! Didn't want to go to bed without a Turkish party update!
8:43:02 PM 
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