So I guess I decided that for these posts I'm gonna' jump around from interview to interview so that things stay a little fresh. Snippets from the interview of each waiter. I'm just sorta' cutting these interviews up and then bringing in different parts. I'm also trying to figure out how to link up the interviews so that if someone talks about something like "regulars" you can click on that term and then see what other people say about it. Plus you can start to follow how many different waiters exact revenge by following a key word such as "spit:...

But I don't know how to do these links yet, so I'm gonna' keep it simple.

For anyone who just started reading, this is the second part to an interview with Blummy. He works at a three star restaurant north of Union Square. It's the second restaurant of a fairly renowned chef whose books you can find at Barnes and Noble. This chef also owns a very famous place around Gramercy Park. THAT restaurant is a real NYC institution. You figure out who the guy is.

So here's Blummy carping a little about the typical crap you run into while waiting tables. Nothing really insightful at this point, just the typical bullshit you encounter while serving clueless people. At this point in the interview, Blummy is just warming up and building up a head of steam before he starts to really go off.

Tomorrow, I'll go back again to Tina where she starts bitching about shitty customers and the shady ways she gets back at them.

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I think Food Network is great. It's bringing the whole kitchen--the culinary, gastronomic aspect, the universe that's out there--to people's homes and exposing them to new avenues. I mean, wine has exploded in the last decade in the U.S.A.

Emeril with his "Bam!" My mother is crazy for Emeril and the Iron Chef. It inspires people to try new recipes and get away from the meat and potatoes type of thing. Not that everyone has the ability to do that.

I think it's all in the mind about how stressful your night is gonna' be. It's stressful both in the front and back of the house. But in the front of the house, you definitely don't get yelled at by the chef. Ya' know what I mean?

I work in quite a delightful atmosphere. Sometimes I have a problem with my captain because he or she might freak out when things get busy, and that puts me on a bad vibe. You can be really busy, but as long as you stay calm and mentally focused and plan out your priorities, then you'll be out of the weeds. Ask for help from your co-workers and it'll be fine. Time doesn't stop and eventually the night will be over. So just stay positive.

The structure of my restaurant is the captain greets the table and takes the drink order. I take the drinks over and give the water. Captain comes back and explains the menu and takes the food order. I put the food order into the computer and set them up for their courses. Clear that course and set them up for their next course, and then set them up for their dessert. I'm the front waiter.

The captain is the brain and the front waiter is the body.

But I like serving because I make a substantial amount of money. I'm 23 and I'm gonna' make over $48,000 this year, and I work forty hours a week. I work nights so I'm mostly nocturnal, and because it's a restaurant, it affords me an easy schedule where I can live a fun life and just party and do whatever the hell I want to. As long as I get to work on time, hungover and stumbling through.

Tired and just cranky.

I don't have a worst customer, exactly. But I do have pet peeves. For example, you go to a table and they ask for a glass of wine. No problem. You bring them the glass of wine.

"Oh! You know what? We'll take a soda for Junior."

I kinda' roll my eyes but don't think nothing about it even though they could have told me before...

"Oh, could I get a lemon?!"

Then you come back and they want a straw. You just want to grab them by the fucking throat and say, "What do you need? Give me a list and I'll bring it to you 'cause I got things to do, man."

Another pet peeve...Let's say you're pouring coffee or water. Something in a cup that holds a fixed amount of liquid. The moment the water gets to the top where I know I have to stop pouring, some clients will give you that hand gesture [Places hand out, palm down, like he's covering a cup] like "Now's the time to stop pouring."

Like God forbid, if they didn't help me out, I would have poured it all over the table until the pitcher was empty.

But my parents brought me all over the world. Brought me to fine restaurants. I've been all over-shitty food, great, four star, five star, and average Joe backwoods in Spain with sawdust all over the rug type of place. I've been around the block. Which helps me appreciate dining.

My family is awesome and my parents go to restaurants often and I sometimes get a table that reminds me of them. Typically, these are the customers that other waiters can't stand 'cause they talk too much. They're too friendly. But that's just because that waiter might have a chip on their shoulder.

When I see a couple out with positive spirits, I try harder to help them out. But sometimes people bring their shitty attitude in from the parking lot. And they're just depressed from the get go. That's hard to turn around. I don't care how good the food is.
11:59:25 PM     comment []