Saturday, June 5, 2004

Carry that Weight It's awfully nice to be accosted at a party and be told to get back to writing. So thanks to darling Jefferson for the vote of confidence. Confidence has been sorely lacking for these last weeks. I am overwhelmed by everything, and still, damn it, feeling utterly griefstricken over losing dear Dr. S. I have moved occasionally to anger, and then I plummet right back into sadness, of a consuming, abandoned kind. It doesn't help that the H and I have been through a mill of conflict that has been stilled, but not dismantled, and as a result I feel fragile, tired and unloved. I am not unloved, BTW, but it's how I feel, and it takes a whole lot of internal monologue pep talk to get past it when it strikes. So there it is. Add to this that I am starting my new job, and feeling not quite up to the task, and I'm pretty much a basketcase. Oh, and did I mention that I am trying, really trying this time, to lose some weight, so I can't even drown my sorrows in cookies, ice cream and potato chips? What was I thinking?? 9:04:48 PM     comment []