O.K.  This is not the most earthshattering disappointment in my life, but it was the one moment that, for me, defined the difference between men and women's roles in our culture.  I often tell it to illustrate that moment when we realize that someone does not appreciate us for who we really are. 

 

I had four brothers and one sister.  It was Christmas during my senior year in high school in Colorado.    With six kids, we were not expecting a deluge of materialism, but a token gift.  I had one brother who was two years older than me and one that was two years younger.  The three of us were extremely close, even going to drive in movies together and just generally having fun.  

 

After we opened our gifts, I realized that both my brothers, with whom I was extremely close, had received a set of snowshoes.  My gift had been clothing--dress up clothing.  I was unusually quiet that evening and finally one of my parents--I don't even remember which one--asked me what was wrong.   I burst out crying, then I was horrified at my response, and finally had to admit to them how much it bothered me that I had received clothing and my brothers, sports equipment.  I told them I would really have loved to get something like that.  They completely did not get it.  It was 1972.  Since then, I have had three daughters and I realize that parents don't always know the person that their child will turn out to be.  But I try to give them a chance to be that person.