Sunday, January 01, 2006

Dear George,   You are such a groundbreaker.  Many are the new frontiers you have opened up; many the rigid doctrines of yesteryear you have shattered.  But the breakthrough that brings tears of joy to my eyes is your establishment of the world’s first teenage government.  You are the logical outcome of the youth movement that began in the sixties.  The level of immaturity you have brought to government is awe-inspiring.  Your philosophy of, “I did it cuz I could,” is the dream of every acne-scarred teenage boy in America.  To act without adult supervision is at the core of the adolescent wet dream.    Teens paint the world in broad swaths of black and white, just as you do.  They prefer the quick, violent solution to a complex problem, just as you do.  They have all the answers, just as you do.  They ignore those who don’t agree with them, just as you do.   George, do you see the potential here?  You are their role model, the man they identify with.  With just a little effort, you could become a political rock star.  Start appearing at Christian youth rallies.  Have Karl work on your delivery; bring in some Baptist ministers as coaches.   With a little practice, you could hoot ‘n holler a pulpit-pounding sermon that would leave the kids wallowing in hysteria and ready to follow you straight into hell   And here’s the payoff:  Mao had his Cultural Revolution; you can have your Christian Revolution.  Publish all your original thoughts in a small book bound in red leather.  It doesn’t matter if the pages are blank.  The little red book is simply a prop, something the kids can shake at humiliated leftist professors as they are paraded around the quad wearing their dunce caps.   Think of all the liberal offices these kids could wreck; the ecosymps they could thrash; the leftist publications they could torch. Think of all the books to be burned and the CDs to be crushed.  The potential here boggles the mind.  How it would divert the masses from the sea of corruption that is your administration.   With a little effort, you could have this all in place in time to steal the midterms and prepare the way for Jeb’s ascension in 2008.   The youth of America are looking to you, George.  Don’t let them down!   Your admirer Belacqua Jones 9:11:07 PM    comment []

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A New Year Greeting         Ring out wild bells to the wild sky.             The flying cloud, the frosty light:             The year is dying in the night; Ring out, wild bells, and let him die.     Ring out the old, ring in the new,             Ring happy bells, across the snow:             The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true.     Ring out old shapes of foul disease,             Ring out the narrowing lust of gold;             Ring out the thousand wars of old, Ring in the thousand years of peace.     Ring in the valiant man and free,             The larger heart, the kindlier hand;             Ring out the darkness of the land, Ring in the Christ that is to be.                                                                   In Memoriam                                                             Alfred, Lord Tennyson         A Happy New Year to each and all. Case 12:19:38 AM    comment []

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