And remember, where you have a concentration of power in a few hands, all too frequently, men with the mentality of gangsters get control. History has proven that. All power corrupts; absolute power corrupts absolutely.
--Lord Acton
Dear George,
The only thing I have to say to Lord Acton is, “It’s about time!” Both the gangster and the despot have one thing in common, the unitary power of the executive.
Now, one of the functions of a despot is to throw lead slugs to the peasantry and act as if they are gold florins. Well, by god George, you were flinging those slugs all over the place in your State of the Union speech last night.
There was the health care slug as you shared your vision to let America take responsibility for its own health insurance with the health care savings accounts. Okay, so this is simply Social Security reform recycled. But if you tell me it’s a gold florin, it’s a gold florin, because I believe you, George; my faith in you never wavers. And I will sleep better tonight knowing that with my gold florin, I can open my health savings account in the morning.
Then there was the energy slug. Absolutely gotta get rid of that nasty oil. And your vision is to use technology to solve the problems created by technology which will create a whole new set of problems for technology to solve. But who cares as long as we get over our addiction to oil by going nuclear and adding to the 75,000 tons of radioactive waste nobody knows what to do with. As for our cars, we can always run them on hydrogen, a truly spectacular fuel, as the survivors of the Hindenburg will tell you.
But the shiniest slug of all was your call for civility. You want to stop all the bickering that is the very foundation of a democratic society. You want no more partisan divisions, only compliant servility. That is why democracy is so messy; there’s just too much debate. I have every confidence that by hook or by crook, and probably crook, you will finally put a stop to debate in America.
Let me tell you, my cries of joy filled the night until my neighbors called the cops on me. I guess they thought I was having another toxic reaction to the sacred smoke. That wasn’t the case, though; it was simply a toxic reaction to your speech.
I love you, big guy.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
9:34:52 PM 
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