Open Letters to George W. Bush
Letters to the president from his ardent admirer Belacqua Jones
Last updated:
6/4/2006; 8:55:18 PM


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Sunday, March 05, 2006

Dear George,

 

War does have its droll moments, doesn’t it?  I was just reading about two Iraqi women whose husbands were collateralized by our forces as part of our democratization of their country.  It seems the peace movement wanted to bring them over so they could go on a speaking tour.  The last thing we need is a couple of weepy widows upsetting our national unity.  People who lose love ones in a war fail to understand one of the finer points of strategy—innocent people die. 

 

I will give the State Department credit for understanding that tragedy goes down easier if flavored with a pinch of humor.  The reason they turned down visas for the pair is that having no loved ones left alive in Iraq, they’d have no incentive to go back. 

 

Once again, we’ve taught Iraq a valuable lesson about democracy:  Freedom’s just another word for saying that you can’t.

 

Your admirer,

Belacqua Jones


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Last update: 6/4/2006; 8:55:18 PM.
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