Dear George,
It is time we admit a basic and fundamental truth that is driving the first decade of the twenty-first century: The future health of Corporatism demands the destruction of America with only a military infrastructure remaining.
The problem is America’s democratic tradition. It is a comatose beast usually content to sit in front of the television and fart as it pops open another can of beer. However, every once in a while, it gets its dander up and becomes very disruptive as it demands what it considers to be its right to food, clothing and shelter. As the complexity of the Corporatist State grows, the damage this beast could do increases exponentially, so we must neutralize it.
This Corporatist agenda has come to the fore during your administration. A country that was once a paragon of republican virtue (well, kind of, sort of, depending on how close you read history, which in your case is not at all, which is great because you wouldn’t like what you’d find) has become a ravening buccaneer, raping and looting as it reduces America to a broken toy.
The three weapons necessary to destroy a country are corporate deregulation, cuts in social spending, and privatization of the public domain. All three have but one aim: the profitication of America.
It is axiomatic that were we to deregulate professional football, it would degenerate into a Darwinian brawl in which the cruelest, not the strongest, would prevail. Such cruelty is the ruling dynamic of the Corporatist State.
Neoliberals envision an unregulated market policed by consumer demands. If consumers demand low mileage SUVs because they’ve been seduced by pastoral advertisements that highlight the joys of bouncing through a nature stripped of stings, venom and grit, that is simply the market speaking. And if the demand for the gas to fuel these behemoths forces us to conquer the Middle East, that is also the market speaking.
According to this ideology, it would be a cakewalk to deregulate crime by doing away with the restrictions imposed on the public by criminal law, the courts and the police. Let the market rule. As crime increases, consumers arm themselves, install stronger locks on their doors, alarm their cars, and form lynch mobs to string up suspected criminals. Eventually, crime decreases and the public becomes complacent creating the conditions for another market cycle to begin as crime once again increases.
Cutting spending on social programs is a bit trickier. However, fear not, feral consumerism and indebtedness have come to our rescue. If the public feels flush because they can go into debt to buy the toys they really don’t need, they won’t get too upset about cuts in social spending. Sure, you’re going to get the occasional sob story about the little tyke facing death because her family can’t afford to hospitalize her. However, the public reaction to this sad situation is to pick up the remote and switch to American Idol. There was a time when oppression was a jack-booted thug. Now it is a tuxedoed male model tooling his Porsche around hairpin curves, a shapely brunette at his side, while the voiceover assures America, “This, too, can by yours!”
Finally, what better way is there to destroy a republic than to privatize it? It’s disgraceful when you think about it, all those public services either breaking even or operating in the red. The Corporatist State is all about profit and tolerates no service that cannot guarantee a brisk return on investment. The Corporatists have already privatized Congress and look at how America has prospered. Corporatists are anarchists at heart because it is their goal to eliminate government altogether and turn America into a feudal corporation in which happy serfs toil long hours so their masters may live in the splendor to which they are entitled.
Your admirer,
Belacqua Jones
7:12:03 AM 
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