It is spring. Time to clean up and reassess. Time to decide what to throw out and what to keep. And what to do with the keepsakes: stow them away at the back of your closet, or make them part of your life.

Scarves and mittens are in the washer and sandals optimistically replace fur-lined boots. Keeping a close eye, I allow sun-shine and spring breezes to caress my tomatoes, peppers, and geraniums. Overnighters are still off-limits.

While my hands sort and toss, I try to generate some order in the jumble of my mind. I am looking for some kind of Dewey decimal system to organize my interests, my predilections, my ruminations and my fears. The important things within reach and nothing forgotten.

I love libraries. I love how you can lose yourself in them and the surprises they hold. At the same time, they make me nervous and uncomfortable. They paralyze me. They force me to make decisions, to exclude. There is too much and I will never know what I am missing. They make me feel small.

I have experienced some of the happiest moments of my life in libraries. I want to go back there. I want to lose myself and celebrate my own irrelevance instead of struggling absurdly to overcome it.

Several weeks ago I came across a topic. I wasn't searching, it presented itself to me. It perfectly suits my interests and my background, while pushing me across boundaries. It spans the times, from very early to the present, and it circles the globe. It is nothing "big" or sensational, but it has captured me and it may just be perfect for me.

I have started some preliminary poking around, and I may take a related graduate course in the fall. Over the summer, I want to spend more time reading and putting my thoughts to paper. I don't know where this will take me, but I know that I need to do this. I know it won't be easy.

I may blog about my work as I move ahead. I do not intend to abandon this blog. I will keep posting about my pickles and jams (not much going on for a while though), and other culinary exploits, the saga of my roof garden or anything else that strikes my fancy. But I feel blogging needs to find its proper place in my mental landscape. I don't think it is the medium that suits me best. Maybe it is too free-wheeling; I seem to do better in a more constrained environment.

However, blogging has helped me sort things out and I got to meet a bunch of very cool people. Speaking of sorting things out and spring-cleaning: I know my category links could use some attention.  1:26:27 PM